To The Person I Used To Call Best Friend

We haven’t seen or spoken to each other for the longest time… In fact, we live almost completely separate lives now, except for where the outer parts of our social circles overlap. And though we may not hear from each other anymore – we do still hear about each other from time to time.
I often wonder what happens when you hear my name. Do you feel even one of the plethora of emotions I experience whenever somebody talks about you? Or is it just me because I was never able to let go? We may be distant enough that we don’t run into each other, but we’re not so far apart that we couldn’t reach out to one another if we really wanted to. But we don’t and that’s what says it all really isn’t it. We don’t contact each other… we stay right where we are, each within the confines of our own little circle never crossing that imaginary line. And the funny thing is that despite the fact we have different feelings towards the current situation, we both keep things the way that they are for the same reason: because you’re happy with your life the way it is. ~Ranata Suzuki

Hello, my old friend. Isn’t it weird how a year can change everything? In fact, it’s already been over a year since we cut each other off completely, and yet it feels like just yesterday we were sitting in your room talking and laughing. But, I’m not here to dwell on the past and who said what (you have no idea how many times I’ve heard ‘But wait, weren’t you guys best friends?’ in the past year), I’m here to tell you that I want to lay all of this to rest.

I’m well aware that what’s broken cannot be fixed, and I promise I’m not trying to put duct tape over a gaping hole. We had always believed BS would never come between us, but life happened and look at where we are now. It’s been a long year, and as much as I would like to say I’ve completely forgotten about you, I can’t. I can’t because there was a time when I proudly called you my best friend, and I could never wish harm upon someone who used to mean so much to me. Sometimes I find myself remembering some of the crazy and hilarious times we’ve had together, but those memories will remain in the past, a reflection of a chapter in my life that I do not and never have regretted.

It’s time I take all of the questions and hurt I've bottled up over the past year and leave them with the memories. I’ll never really know what caused the abrupt falling out we had, but as many say, there’s a reason people come and go in life. We’re two completely different people than who we were a year ago. I’m thankful for the role you had in my life, because without you I never would have found such amazing people and opportunities that I’m beyond grateful to have in my life now. Neither of us are perfect. I know following our falling out I said negative things out of hurt and anger and I know you said negative things because you were hurt too.

I’m tired of carrying around the memory of a broken friendship. I’m over the pettiness and late-night subtweets, and ’m beyond done with having to explain the details to curious acquaintances, so I’m leaving all of that in the past.

From now on, when people ask, we were just two people that had a falling out and went their separate ways. We shared good memories but we’ve moved on to new chapters in our lives.

I hope life is treating you well, and I wish you and your family nothing but success and good health. I’ll continue to pave the path for my future, and I hope you do too. Should you need me in the future, I’ll be right here. ~Laura Guerriero