I want to feel alive

I long for a life i have control of

i want a space of my own,
decorated pictures that
hold memories,

soft pillows and scented candles
i want shelves filled 
with books of adventure 
and poetry,
i want to wake up every morning,
excited for what is to come
i want to look up at the sky
and feel the sun warm my face
i want to go on walks and hikes
and feel healthy and strong
i want to feel productive
and satisfied
i want to take more photographs
and take up new hobbies
i want to become friends
with more interesting people

i want to feel alive