Dealing with disappointment in life


Life is full of disappointment. Some people can’t get the job that they long for. A women broke up with her boyfriend who recently proposes her. Another person loses their job. A lady who lost her baby. Many people face the disappointment. Life is full of disappointment but how we respond to disappointment can make all the difference.

Expect your disappointment as a part of life. Although we would like to avoid disappointment it is impossible. If you expect disappointment in your life. You will not surprise when it comes and you will be able to face it with the right attitude.

When was the last time you faced disappointment from a certain outcome that did not meet your expectations?

It could be any event in your life, from a big setback to a small mishap. Perhaps your meeting at work did not go as well as you anticipated. Your new job was not what you expected. Maybe your salary never come and your boss so ignorant like nothing wrong is happening.

Maybe someone you like did not reciprocate your feelings. Maybe your relationship did not work out the way you hope it would.

How did it feel? Did you feel a certain sense of numbness and void inside of you? Were you hopeless and miserable? Did it feel like it was the end of the world?

Disappointments are dissatisfaction that arises when your expectations are not met by outcomes. In short, you had an expectation but things did not unfold against the expectation.

Every day, people deal with disappointments. Depending on how big the disappointment is and how you choose to deal with it, the feeling of disappointment may dissipate after a short while or hang over your life for an extended period. If not handled properly, disappointments can lead to depression and eventually apathy.

Contrary to what people may think, disappointment is actually positive experience for our life.

If you don’t care about something, you wouldn’t be feeling disappointed, would you? The very presence of disappointment comes when something you care about so much does not turn the way we expect it. The higher your disappointment, the stronger your passion for this is.

As Martin Luther King Jr puts it very adeptly, “There can be no deep disappointment where there is not deep love.” This deep love is what drives you towards your goals, dreams and desires. This deep love will be what fuels you in life, bringing you to places you have never been before. This deep loveis what makes life worth living. Remember that disappointment is always a better emotional state than apathy or neutrality where the person feels indifferent towards anything. I would much rather be feeling a negative emotion any day than feeling absolutely nothing. The ability to feel is what sets us apart from non-living beings. To feel nothing is like a robot or a machine.

Disappointment also signals an opportunity for progress and growth. If you disappointed in an outcome, it means there is actually a certain error in your framework of thought which needs to resolve.

Whenever you disappointed, it means you have certain expectation about reality which you need to deal with. On the other side, if your perceptions of reality are always right, you will never feel disappointed at all. By correcting your expectation and getting a more accurate picture of the reality, you equipped with more knowledge. This knowledge is a source of power; power for you to act towards your goals.

By using the knowledge from your previous experience, you can act more accurately towards your desires. The more you deal with disappointment and learn from it, the closer you will get towards your goals and dreams.

People deal with their disappointment in many ways. Some are negative and destructive ways and other people deal with a positive attitude. The way you react to disappointment can build you or can destruct you. What will be your choice?

1.No matter how careful or positive we are, we are bound to experience grief, suffering, pain, fear, and anxiety, for they are part of life, the price we pay for the privilege of sharing in the joys of life.Since you can count on suffering, make sure you can count on joy. Get-together with friends, and time to enjoy your hobbies, nature, and the arts. By spending time for fun, with the people you care and care about you will guarantee that any grief you experience will intersperse with joy.

2. Don’t be guilty of reverse vision. That is, don’t look inward when you should look outward, and don’t look outward when you should look inward. Here’s what I mean. Are you disappointed in someone who doesn't live up to your expectations? If you are, you are guilty of reverse vision. You are looking outward (at your friends’ conduct) when you should look inward (at your own conduct). How can you be disappointed by the failure of your friends or relatives to live up to your expectations when you yourself fail to live up to your own expectations? When you see your own weaknesses, you’ll be able to accept the weaknesses of others. Are you sometimes devastated by misfortune and wonder how life so cruel? If so, you are guilty of reverse vision. You are looking inward when you should look outward. How can you beat your chest and cry out, “Woe is me,” when so many people are suffering to a much greater degree? When you begin to cry out, “”Woe is them,” you’ll start to thank for your blessings.

3. When you learn to welcome challenges and love problem solving, disappointments will disappear.Enjoy the thrill of being a champion by relishing battles, whether you win or lose them. Whenever things go wrong, analyze the situation and see what you can learn and then move on. If you are constantly running into hurdles when pursuing a long-term goal, just remember there is no failure until you give up, so don’t! Don’t you love puzzles? Life is a maze (it is also amazing). Enjoy it! When you run into a dead-end, just turn around and try again! Be an explorer, an adventurer. Take risks. Shoot for the stars! To do so is to experience an excitement that far exceeds the power of any disappointment that may come your way.

4. You will not enjoy or win at cards if all you do is complain about the hand you’re dealt. Expect nothing more from life than what it offers and you will never be let down. Welcome the opportunities it provides by making the most of the cards you’re dealt. Also, don’t forget to feed your mind with positive thoughts by reading good books. Then make those thoughts your own by reflecting on them. When you understand them, you will fill your mind with light. Apply what you learn by practicing it.

5. If you experience a disappointment that you find difficult to overcome without help, talk to friends.That will help you realize that you’re not alone and that others have overcome similar problems. And speaking of friends, don’t disappoint them and chances are they’ll never disappoint you, but if they do, forgive them, for how can someone hurt you if you forgive them? If you appeal to the best side of your friends, the chances are you won’t disappoint

6. Abandon perfect expectations. Are you looking for the perfect mate? If you are, you’re sure to disappoint. For only God is perfect. We human being are imperfect. If you can accept that, you can cut much unnecessary misery from your life. The same is true for the perfect job, perfect child, or perfect life. It doesn’t exist.

7. Finally, cultivate patience, for as Joseph Addison (1672 ~ 1719) wrote, “Our real blessings often seem to us in the shape of pains, losses and disappointments; but let us have patience and we soon shall see them in their proper figures.”

“ We rejoice in the hope of the glory of God, not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance, perseverance produces character, character produces hope, and hope does not disappoint us because God has poured out his love in our hearts.”

Source: sidehearts.wordpress.com

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